Tribute To My Best Friend
By Steve Ensley
As many of you know, I write this column to address issues the Lord has put on my heart about the Internet and our own responsibilities as Christians using the Internet. I want to take this opportunity to deviate a little and take another approach to the Internet by paying tribute to my best friend.
This week on July 31st, I celebrated my 30th wedding anniversary with my best friend, Jeanne. I could go on and on about her qualities and I probably will, but I find myself wholly inadequate to describe the joy that she has brought into my life.
For example, I could talk about her dry sense of humor or I could speak of her honesty. I might relate about her melancholy temperament that makes her so discerning. How about her personal beauty inside and out! I could even shout with pride to the heavens about the three beautiful children she bore and the four miscarriages that took their toll. But, these and a thousand other qualities could not begin to describe the blessings our relationship has become over the last 30 years.
However, I think what I really need to say about Jeanne is that she knows how to love. Now, I don't say that flippantly and I don't mean the world's definition of love. I mean God's definition of love!
I know this because over the last 30years I have seen her live it, not just talk it! This lady has had every right in the world to dump me and call an end to our marriage. Sometimes it seems I have been so stupid that an earthworm would look like a genius next to me. But through all of this, she has stood by me, encouraged me, challenged me and mostly loved me unconditionally. How in the world could I possibly describe how much that has meant too me? I cannot, but I am sure going to try!
Her faithfulness and love have been a reason for me to live. Who she is has made me a better person. Who I am, I owe in no small measure to her. And that's the truth.
If you get the idea that I am madly "in love" with my wife, than you are right! So, with your indulgence and patience, let me tie this in to the Internet. How many of us have been seeking a relationship all our lives that will fill our hearts the way Jeanne has filled mine? I would dare say that most of us adults have been there at one time or another!
How many of us have turned to Internet relationships to fill that hole in our hearts? Too many, I am afraid. Too many of us have bought into the false hope of a superficial Internet relationship and discovered too late that it was a lie.
Like a lot of things in our culture, the Internet has made it possible for us to conveniently seek out virtual relationships in privacy when we don't want to work very hard on our real-life relationships. It makes it very easy to justify walking away from the real work it takes to build a relationship. It makes it seem very simple to just find someone else who can "relate" to us better. But it is a lie!
Anyone who thinks Jeanne has had it easy for the last 30 years is way off the mark. It has not been easy and I thank God that the Internet did not come between us with false promises. I thank God that Jeanne knew that a long-term relationship was hard work and that it was worth working for.
There are a lot of wonderful things about the Internet, but there is also a lot of deception, especially in chat rooms. This deception is about everything including age, looks, marital status, intent, etc. A long-term relationship cannot be built on deception and an intimate relationship that is not long term is not satisfying. These are hard words, but they are no less true!
So the next time you use the Internet and you have the temptation to flirt or go searching, beware of the deception and instead put your effort into building the relationship that God has already given you. And please, get a filter, a filter that blocks unmonitored chat rooms! It will help you resist those temptations.
Thanks for you patience and letting me share my tribute!
"Jeanne, I love you!"
God bless you everyone!
Steve Ensley
AFO